CHINESE COMPANY BUYS 40% STAKE IN WAL-MART

Deepens “Strategic Partnership”

Little Rock (WPI) - Chinese financial conglomerate Sheg-Whi-Ti, LTD., of Beijing has purchased a 40% stake in American retail giant Wal-Mart of Little Rock.

In announcing the sale Wal-Mart chairman Steven “Spanky” Walton, nephew of legendary founder Sam Walton, said, “This is an important day in the development of our company. Yesterday we were the world’s largest retailer, tomorrow we will be even bigger!” he said referring to the potential for opening stores in the previously locked out China market.

At his side in Little Rock was Chou On Li, CFO of Sheg-Whi-Ti, LTD. The diminutive executive, formerly a career soldier, stood rigidly as the American announcement was made. Through an interpreter he made a brief statement, “The People’s Republic of China welcomes this new strategic partnership with our corporate American allies.”

Short, with a military haircut, Chou left the podium with a determined, ram-rod posture refusing to take any questions.

Walton comments reflected the changing state of the global economy. “As many of you know,” said the CEO grinning at the bank of reporters, “ Wal-Mart and Sam’s Club has total dominance of the discount ‘Big Box’ retail business. We dominate in Europe now, and intend to expand into the Balkans, then Russia. Our new partnership with China positions us to develop the Far East and Indian peninsula.”

Walton described his personal satisfactions, “The most exciting thing, I think, is that the Chinese people will finally get to enjoy the fruits of their productivity. The rapidly developing Chinese economy will finally permit workers to buy some of the things they have been producing for export for these last several decades. This is truly an American opportunity we are able to bring to the peasants of the third world!”

“Think of it!” he continued, “A BILLION potential consumers. Financed by millions of low-income American families, money pours into China like Niagra Falls. Because of trickle-down economics, soon the average Chinese plastics factory-worker will be able to buy disposable razors, frizbees, DVD players, extra phones, throw-away cameras, flip-flops and the whole inventory of essential family products sold in our stores!”

“I’m talking about a BILLION consumers folks!” he gushed. “”And that doesn’t even include Indian and Pakistan, too”