BUSH CANCELS OPRAH APPEARANCE

Harpo is Oprah spelled backwards!

Washington, (WPI) - Citing scheduling conflicts, the White House today announced that President Bush was cancelling a scheduled appearance on the Oprah Winfrey Show slated for Monday. Bush planned to “chat” with the famous celebrity and discuss some of his plans for, “life after the presidency.”

Network promotions for the show had indicated that the Mr. Bush would talk about book and movie offers, speaking engagements, how “presidential celebrity” differed from ordinary celebrity and describe the progress and success in Iraq.

Political critics reacted to the news immediately.

Senate minority leader Harry Reid said, “I don’t think Mr Bush cancelled, I think Oprah did. Look at the embarrassment she suffered last week having to admit that the book she promoted was filled with lies. How’s she going to feel backtracking on Bush’s statements.”

Reid was referring to the revelation that author James Frey admitted that his “memoir” was largely fictional.

Winfrey, who helped Frey’s book skyrocket to the bestseller list after she deemed it “Oprah Book Club-worthy,” accused the former drug addict of “lying” and causing her “embarrassment and regret.”

“I trusted you. A heroine addict, alcoholic, crackhead, meth user and wife-abuser. I trusted you!” Winfrey tearily accused Frey on her program last Thursday.

“I have been really embarrassed by this,” a furious Winfrey said to Frey. “I was really behind this book . . . Now I feel that you conned us all.”

Even some conservative colleges of the President agreed.

Tucker Carlson, himself a favorite Oprah guest and “flamboyant” conservative political pundit said, “There’s no way she wants Bush on now. Oprah was terribly humiliated by the whole Frey-Gate thing. What’s she going to do with the President? He was nailed about WMD’s, Iraq is a disaster, Katrina bombed, etc., etc., etc. What can the poor guy say that sounds good and isn’t a lie? I just don’t think she wants to go through all those “Mea Culpas” again.”

White House spokesman Scott McCellen said that the President would reschedule his appearance soon