Indians Spread Sewage On Bush Exit

Known as a 'Hot Karl' in the West, Hindu Priests take 'purifing' Ganges shower

New Delhi, (WPI) - Tens of thousands of Hindu priests, clerics, deacons and even nuns took to the streets yesterday in what was declared a massive “National Purification” after the departure of President and Mrs. Bush and their entourage.

“India is a holy place, a land of many blessings,” said Sori Imeeshdu, mayor of New Delhi, “ The presence of this American president put a stink on the land, a rancid aroma of cheap perfumes, fried foods, homosexual sex and leather. Especially leather, we hate that.”

Wherever Mr. Bush went the public was repelled by the smell. Official photographers had to frame their pictures carefully to exclude the people in the background holding their noses.

"The world press has been told the purification is because of the dogs but this is not the truth. We love animals. It is the Bush people who left a nasal stain on our country,” said local grocer, Singh Singh Assonge.

“We have specially trained our staff and politicians to tolerate the stink," said diplomat Brahm Aabool. “Anyone who would come in proximity of smelling the Americans have undergone weeks of desensitizing to enable them to interact without revealing the natural revulsion they have for the stench.”

It was reported that this trip was especially difficult for the female staff in attendance to Mrs. Bush.

“Did you smell that terrible cheap perfume she wears?” squealed several young women who had been asigned to clean Mrs. Bush’s hotel room after she left. “God did it STINK! Worse than a Bombay whore!” they giggled.

The purification process involved tanker trucks filled with water drawn directly from the sacred Ganges river being sprayed or poured across the ground anywhere the American entourage had passed.

“This is not a simple process,” said Hindu priest Vijay Dijay. “Ganges water is not thin like drinking water. It is thick, almost like a gruel.”

The Ganges River is considered sacred to India’s 895 million practicing Hindus. It is also the recipient of several billion pounds of human and animal waste every day in this largely underdeveloped nation.

“To you Westerners the Ganges may smell poorly but this is not your country. Our noses are very sophisticated. Your President stinks of arrogance and death, his wife smells like a French brothel and your Marines reek of spermatooza and freshly killed cows- which are scared to us you know.” said British educated Winston Gandhi VIII, owner of a telemarketing company in Delhi.

It is expected that the application of the Ganges feces laden slurry will take approximately one week to apply.