After Arrest Wendy’s Want Customers Back

Body Parts Store

San Jose, 4/25/05- Anna Ayala has been charged with attempted grand larceny after she claimed she bit down a human finger while eating chili in a Wendy’s restaurant here on March 22. After Ayala’s claim, sales dropped in the fast food emporiums across Northern California creating layoffs and reduced hours for workers. According to the felony complaint filed against her, losses to Wendy's in the Bay area are estimated at $2.5 million.

It now turns out that Ayala has a history of bringing claims against big corporations. She was arrested Thursday at her suburban Las Vegas home. She is scheduled to appear in court Tuesday.

San Jose police called Ayala's claim a scam and refused to say where the finger originated or exactly how the hoax was carried out. Said San Jose Police Chief Rob Davis, “I’ll bet there’s some desperate schmuck, up to his eyeballs in gambling debts, sitting in a motel someplace in Vegas with his finger all wrapped up.”
"Our evidence suggests the truest victims in this case are indeed the Wendy's owners, operators and employees here in San Jose," said the ample, sycophantic Davis, a regular Wendy’s customer, on Friday.

"It's been really tough," said Joseph Desmond, owner of the victimized Wendy's franchise. "My thanks also go out to all the little people who were hurt. They lost a lot of wages because we had to cut back. Naturally, I am happy about the reduced overhead, but not the loss of sales." Desmond told the San Jose Star Tribune that he earns more than a million dollars annually from the store. “I wish I didn’t have to make the layoffs, but I have myself, the sole shareholder, to answer to,” he said.

Despite the horror and loss of appetite suffered by residents throughout the region, numerous loyal customers continued to visit and even eat at the Wendy's where Ayala made her claim.

On Friday, “Crazy” Chuck McGill charged into the restaurant and ordered two bowls of chili to go plus a baked potato topped with chili, a frosty and fries with chili.

"If my wife Betty and the other people working back there have all their fingers, then it don’t bother me. Besides, you know any of the other crap they put in hamburgers?” he asked laughing toothlessly.

“Hell yeah,” added eavesdropping Red Ruffalo, another regular patron. “I used to work in a meat packing plant,” he went on, “You ever seen a cow sphincter? It’s as big as your head, and twice as hairy! And that ain’t the half of it!”

Added the backslapping McGill, “A human finger, even a human pecker, is probably better than most of the crap in them burgers!”